The Life of Body Hair

This is a very important subject that we all need to deal with at some point in our lives. It is the issue of body hair. What’s too much, and what’s too little?  I personally like a man who has some chest hair, scruff, and a trimmed downstairs. I don’t need it completely weeded, and I don’t need it flowing and wild like Rapunzel. I am a middle ground type of girl and always have been, and boy do I like it when it’s just right. Recently it has come to my attention that there are three types of men when it comes to body hair. The first is the type that has body hair everywhere… especially downstairs where it is mucho wild. He doesn’t trim, he just has a layer of carpet all over. The second is the middle man, who trims, and leaves it tidy enough so us ladies can find our way. I like this man. Thirdly, there’s the guy that lost all his hair! I ask, where did it go? Did some little waxing fairy come by and say “Hay boy, you’d look sweet for the ladies if you looked like a baby boy, let me take care of that for you.”  To me, this isn’t my thing, but recently I’ve been getting some bald eagles. He has some on his legs, some on his face but even his arm hair seems trimmed. The rest isn’t trimmed, it’s gone. Like brand new baby gone. Why would a man decide to do that? He isn’t manly, like a lumberjack, when he feels like a baby’s ass. To me, I need a man who feels like a man. Calluses on the hands, hair on the body just enough that it’s visible that he’s a guy and it offers some stimulation.

For the men who are naturally lacking hair, that’s fine. I don’t judge that, lack of chest hair is doable. However, if the downstairs is not trimmed, I’m not going to run away but I’m certainly going to write about it in a post. If I have everything neat and tidy, doesn’t it trigger the thought that maybe, just maybe he should put some effort in? If he’s nervous about scissors near your junk, or a trimmer, have no fear, take your time or ask a friend. They’re always there to help, no?

I must admit that I have waxed a friend’s back before and I didn’t mind one bit. Perhaps it was the fact that I was ripping hair out of his back and laughing wildly while doing so, but nonetheless he had a beautifully (red) hairless back at the end. He was happy with the results and asked me why no one had told him about it before. I do have a problem telling men to fix something. It is something my lovely McKenzie doesn’t have a problem with and I love her for her honesty, but I can never find the right words to help them correct something that’s just not working for them.

I’d like to use Waxed Back as an example of perfect distribution of body hair. He had the chest hair going on that, as far as I remember, was trimmed not shaved to the bone or waxed off (nothing worse than feeling stubble rub on my chest). His lower region was trimmed and well maintained. It was much appreciated. Then I had the boyfriend who would shave everything. EVERYTHING. (Why was he my boyfriend? I keep asking myself this.) He would get his chest hair going, and I would be happy finally that my chest wasn’t rubbed red by his stubble. Stubble on the chest is not attractive. I know he hated his chest hair because it would turn into carpet man if he let it, but I hated when I came home once in a while and would see my boyfriend naked as a mole rat and he would try having sex with me, I couldn’t get it out of my mind. It didn’t help when all I could feel was skin… It also doesn’t help that I’m gagging while writing this.

I have noticed over the years, however, men with it trimmed or shaved are more likely to have a lot of sex rather than the men who nicely trim or leave it wild. It almost gives me a story of who this man is. The shaved or waxed man is likely to be a ladies man, thinking he is greater than he is and adding many to his list of babes (yes, it was the case with my ex). The wild man is likely to be more inexperienced, recently (or still) married, or a long-term relationship guy. This works for me, but again, how do you tell him that going down there isn’t going to be as enjoyable when I’m flossing my teeth? The man who trims neat enough may just not like the look of a bush engulfing his little fella. In any case, what a man does to his body hair tells a tale of who he is. Keep that in mind the next time you are with a new man and you see what’s making headlines in the pants.